Let Them Be Bored: Why That's Actually a Good Thing

Let Them Be Bored: Why That’s Actually a Good Thing 

As we hit the midway point of the summer school break, many parents brace themselves for that dreaded refrain: “I’m bored.” It often hits a nerve, triggering guilt, annoyance, or the temptation to frantically curate an enriching experience. What if we turned it around and stopped seeing boredom as the enemy? In fact, it might be one of the most underappreciated gifts we can offer children, teenagers, and ourselves (we’re not exactly experts at sitting still either). This article explores why boredom is developmentally important, how it fosters creativity and problem-solving, and what it stirs up in us when children aren’t engaging in the way we think they “should.”  

Boredom and the Brain 

Boredom has a bit of a branding problem. In a productivity-obsessed culture, idleness is often mistaken for laziness or a lack of ambition. But boredom, particularly in childhood, is a psychological state that actually supports creativity, innovation, and self-reflection. 

A 2014 study from the University of Central Lancashire found that people who engaged in boring tasks (like copying numbers) later performed better on creative problem-solving challenges compared to those who weren’t bored at all (Mann & Cadman, 2014). When the brain isn’t constantly fed stimulation, it begins to wander. It draws connections, imagines scenarios, and generates ideas. It can be a launchpad. Einstein’s time as a patent clerk is a well-known example of this effect (Brinkhof, 2023). The routine nature of the work gave his mind the freedom to explore complex scientific concepts, ultimately contributing to some of his most important breakthroughs.  

Children need this mental space. It’s how they begin to explore their own interests, develop autonomy, and learn to tolerate discomfort without panicking or running to an easy fix, like social media or YouTube. A child’s ability to independently work their way through a state of boredom has even been linked to enhanced self-regulatory processes in adulthood (Anderson & Perone, 2023). In a world where entertainment is just a tap away (hello, TikTok), the ability to tolerate the negative experience of “wanting, but being unable, to engage in a satisfying activity” is an important developmental milestone (Eastwood & Frischen, 2012).  

What it brings up in adults 

Here’s where things get tricky: children being bored often makes adults deeply uncomfortable. 

Sometimes this discomfort is logistical. We still have work to do, meals to cook, and errands to run, and a child hanging around saying “there’s nothing to do” can feel like pressure to fix the situation. Other times it’s emotional. We worry that if our child is bored, it means we’re failing them. We might hear an echo of our own childhood summers, and either try to recreate a golden age or course-correct from what we lacked. And beneath all that, there’s often a quieter fear... that they’re watching us in our boredom too, scrolling blankly through phones, unsure how to sit with the stillness ourselves. 

The urge to control how a child spends their time can be strong, especially if we equate enrichment with success. But children are not blank slates waiting to be programmed with “good” hobbies. They are people, with preferences, temperaments, and internal rhythms that may not always align with ours. If your child doesn’t want to craft, or bake cookies or refuses to read the “lovely book” you picked out, it doesn’t mean they’re broken or that you haven’t found the right solution. It just means they’re asserting agency. And that’s part of growing up. 

What Boredom Can Lead To 

Left long enough with their own boredom – and being encouraged away from excessive screen time - most children will eventually do something with it. That “something” might not look impressive to an adult. Lining up toy cars for an hour, making up dramatic scenarios with pets, making a fort out of books, or poking at an anthill is how play, creativity, and executive functioning skills evolve (Eberhart et al., 2023). Instead of curating specific activities or orchestrating picture-perfect moments, think of it more like scattering breadcrumbs for curiosity. Leave out a jigsaw puzzle half-started, a tray of paints and sponges, or some half-used modelling clay. Toss a few different balls in the garden without comment, leave a stack of comic books on the couch, set out some string and beads, or even just put the Bluetooth speaker within reach. Think of them less like instructions, but more like quiet invitations. Bits and pieces of potential play that your child can pick up (or not) on their own terms. When materials are accessible but pressure-free, kids are more likely to engage with them in ways that feel self-directed, and that’s where the real magic happens (Begnaud et al., 2020).  

For teens, boredom can open the door to introspection, daydreaming, and even existential curiosity. What looks like laziness or withdrawal is often just them metabolizing big developmental shifts. Adolescence is a time for meaning-making, and sometimes “doing nothing” is part of that process (Eivers & Kelly, 2020). When a teenager says they’re bored, it can sound like a complaint, but it’s often a pause. An in-between space. Left alone long enough, and without the steady drip of TikTok or gaming, most teens will follow their own curiosity. That might mean strumming a guitar, rearranging their room again, or lying on the floor blasting music while staring at the ceiling. It’s still doing something. Teens need room to be aimless, even a bit moody, before anything creative or self-directed can emerge. You don’t need to jump in with a list of “wholesome ideas.” Just making the space feel available - leaving out art supplies, their old keyboard or guitar, or a few interesting magazines says “you can try something here, or not. No pressure.” They may not know what they feel like doing, but they do know they don’t want to be told. Especially for teens, pushing back is often less about the activity and more about working out who they are. 

One last thought 

Boredom is a portal, and it’s where ideas can begin. It’s how kids start to build their own coping tools, inner worlds, and sense of self. The tricky bit is letting that process unfold without trying to patch it over. Especially when their discomfort brushes up against ours.  

With that said, here’s something to consider... how do you deal with boredom? Do you ever allow yourself to be bored? What do your kids see you do when you feel aimless or restless? It’s worth noticing, gently, without judgement. And if that discomfort starts to feel overwhelming, you don't have to navigate through it alone. The team at MyMind is here to support you, whether you're feeling stuck, stirred up, or simply unsure of what comes next.

Being bored in the summer isn’t a crisis, but a chance. A moment for growth, creativity, and for learning that life doesn’t always come preloaded with entertainment. The real work, for us as adults, is holding steady in that space. Not fixing. Not filling. Just letting it be. 

References 

Anderson, A. J., & Perone, S. (2024). The kids are bored: Trait boredom in early childhood and links to self-regulation, coping strategies, and parent–child interactions. Journal of Experimental Child Psychology, 243, 105919.  

Begnaud, D., Coenraad, M., Jain, N., Patel, D., & Bonsignore, E. (2020, June). "It's just too much" - exploring children's views of boredom and strategies to manage feelings of boredom. In Proceedings of the interaction design and children conference (pp. 624-636). 

Brinkhof, T. (2023, July 5th). The Fascinating Science of Boredom: Is It Actually Good for Us. Discover Magazine. https://www.discovermagazine.com/mind/the-fascinating-science-of-boredom-is-it-actually-good-for-us 

Eastwood, J. D., Frischen, A., Fenske, M. J., & Smilek, D. (2012). The unengaged mind: Defining boredom in terms of attention. Perspectives on psychological science, 7(5), 482-495. 10.1177/1745691612456044. 

Eberhart, J., Paes, T. M., Ellefson, M. R., & Marcovitch, S. (2023). Executive functions and play. Trends in Neuroscience and Education, 30, 100198. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tine.2023.100198 

Eivers, A., & Kelly, A. B. (2020). Navigating the teenage years: What do we know about how adolescents find meaning and purpose?. In Navigating life transitions for meaning (pp. 15-30). Academic Press. 

Mann, S., & Cadman, R. (2014). Does being bored make us more creative? Creativity Research Journal, 26(2), 165–173. https://doi.org/10.1080/10400419.2014.901073